“Handsome Jewish Blonde Husband” (Large white teeth!)

“White House in Suburb With Picket Fence (Without Room for MY Mother)

”Mother Who Calls Only Once A Day…Or Less” (The impossible dream)

“Size 6 Lilly Pulitzer Wardrobe”   (Let’s not forget the white sandals and beads.  )

“Chocolate Lab Who is Perfectly Paper trained.” (Muse for a perfect husband)

“Mother Who is Perfectly Paper Trained (and will not criticize new lime green wardrobe.)

“Blonde children who are biologically my own.   I am brunette.”   (Who of course are perfectly athletic)

“Unparallel cooking ability.”    (Specialize in game meats)

Cute boutique that sells expensive, but very small but objects that family and dog finds on world tours.

Facility to drink Grey Goose without slurring words and mistaking similar looking Aryan neighbor for husband.